10 places women want to be touched

Forget a woman's cleavage, there are more erogenous spots that you can now explore to get your lady so excited. Read on to discover her ten most body parts waiting to be discovered.

Women are sensuous creatures and they love being kissed and caressed. What guys often mistake is that they go straight for the woman's breasts or other private parts, without concentrating on her other moan zones. So, if you want to get your gal into the mood, stimulate some of her often-neglected body parts.

Touch these places during foreplay and sex, or just give her some pleasure after a hard day and she'll surely reward you with brownie points in bed.

Tresses
All guys like women with gorgeous locks. But what you need to know is that women love being touched on their head. It's quite a stress reliever. Running your hands sensuously through her tresses is likely to send shivers down her spine. Massage her temples to the nape of her neck and she’ll be game to your desires.

Nape of her neck
In ancient Japan, the back of a woman’s neck was considered extremely attractive by men as it was one of the few zones that were not covered by the elaborate kimono. Today, very few men focus on the nape of the neck, but we suggest you build up the pleasure by gentle touching and kissing your lady love from her hairline down to her shoulders. It will make her reach dizzying heights of pleasure.

Collar bone
A well-defined collarbone is what men find irresistible. So, why not touch and kiss her there. Unbutton her shirt just a little and stimulate her collarbone with your touch. Create circles with your tongue and give her love bites right there, just to remind her of how much you want her.

Small of her back
Most women love it when their guy places his protective hand against the small of her back as it shows that he feels very strongly about her. So, why not incorporate this gesture into your foreplay routine, by kissing or licking down her spine to end up with a kiss on the small of her back. It will definitely get her into the mood for more!

Behind her knees
This area is a power house of sensitive nerve endings. You can gently caress the back of her knee under her skirt while the two of you are in an open public space as it is sure to get her excited by the time you reach home.

Palms of her hands
We use our hands to please our partners, but have you ever thought that you could arouse a woman by stimulating the palm of her hand? Run your finger along her palm as that will make her feel relaxed and ready for a sexy rendezvous ahead.

Her earlobes
This is one of the most erogenous moan centers of a woman's body. Touching, kissing and even gently biting her earlobes will send her into a sexual tizzy. If you are getting extra adventurous, simply nibble around the outside of the rest of her ear as well, but don't put your tongue inside her ear. That's a major turn off!

Happy feet
There's nothing more sinfully seductive than a foot massage. It will help her relax, especially if her job requires her to be on them all day. Get yourself some aromatic massage oil or lotion. Pay extra attention to the pressure points such as her toes, ankles and the sides of her feet too. Some women love enjoy having their toes sucked, but others find it repulsive, so ask your babe what she would have you do before putting them in your mouth.

Soft thighs
Touching a woman's inner thighs without touching her private parts is the most sensual tease that is sure to get her all charged up. Employ your hands and mouth to caress and kiss the insides of her thighs, remember to pull back before going all the way.

Top sex mistakes women make

You won’t mind going that extra mile to please your partner in bed, but unfortunately you won’t know much about the mistake that you ‘inadvertently’ commit while having sex.


While men are more active during sex, so they end up being more aggressive and thus go wrong expecting their female counterpart to be equally participative. Nonetheless, women too are not far behind. Keeping their desires and apprehensions under wraps; they often end up committing several sex mistakes that tend to kill their sexual pleasure.

Here are some of the common gaffes that women admit to committing in bed. And we get the experts to share the possible ways to deal with these...

1. Let’s talk darling : Women seem to be forgetting the theory of ‘actions speak louder than words’. Insisting a lot more than guys on never-ending talks they actually end up spoiling the mood for a steamy sex romp.

Quick fix : Dr. Kanika Vohra, a psychologist shares, “Sex is about close gestures, physical intimacy and exchange of touch with your partner, so too much talking might not be invited. Women must understand the mood of the situation and accordingly cut down their discussions and concentrate more on love making that is the main objective for the night.”

2. Are you sure of this position? : Bearing apprehensions about sex positions isn’t a good idea as most women end up revealing their anxiety about trying out newer positions. Also, the fact that women are least experimental in bed, often leads to restraining their partner from experiencing full pleasure.

Quick fix : Dr. Pravesh Sharma, a Bangalore-based sexologist elucidates, “Being inquisitive is good, but that doesn’t mean you start doubting your partner’s moves in bed. It’s advisable that whatever position he is keen on trying, let him progress slowly and without getting restless, try to attain the comfort level. Still if you feel uneasy, then put forward your concerns softly.”

3. I’m done, not it’s your turn : Enjoy sex like a game, but treating it as obligation can mar your sexual bliss. The tendency which is reflected among females is a big turn off during intimate moments.

Quick fix : Dr. Ratan Mehrotra, a sex therapist states, “It’s really awful to consider sex like a give and take deal. Even if you have experienced an orgasm, make sure you hold on to the pleasure moments till your partner achieves climax. Being blunt about such things can kill his sex drive and make him feel that you are no more interested in the act.”

4. Did you enjoy foreplay? : Once done, it’s essential to come out of the foreplay hangover, which women tend to stick on to for way

too long. Repeated references to foreplay enjoyment sometimes divert the mind from the actual moments of passion.

Quick fix : Dr. Shikha Kataria, a sex and relationship counselor says, “Sex is all about enjoying the present state of mind, so women should be able to differentiate between arousing acts and real action. Mentioning it repeatedly that you had more fun during foreplay may land the lady in a tricky situation where the male partner starts losing interest in sex.”

5. Fantasies aren’t always obvious : Sexual desires are not meant to be hidden, so speak out your mind and let your partner know what you expect from them in bed. It may be difficult to express them openly, but it’s no less than a mistake when a lady starts expecting the guy to read her mind all the time.

Quick fix : “Most women feel shy in opening up and by doing so they create a vacuum in their sex life. It’s important to share your desires overtly to let your partner know what arouses you the most. Resort to mediums like writing letters, recording a tape or showing them what arouses your senses through a movie scene,” suggests Dr. Kanika.

6. Gentle touch can kill passion : Being too gentle with your touch and gestures might be insufficient to evoke the sensuous senses of your partner. As he nears climax, it’s your touch that can make or break his sexual mood.

Quick fix : “Just knowing a male’s pressure points might not solve the purpose, so know exactly how they like being touched. Once you get hold of the right trigger zones and you know how to play up in the right manner, it’s surely going to be a perfect romp,” says Dr. Sharma.

7. Relying on men for orgasm : A gratifying sexual session demands equal participation from both partners. Therefore, it’s wrong to assume that a male partner will always make efforts to get the perfect climax.

Quick fix : “Women must make efforts to show that they’re equally excited. Take charge of your own orgasm and to enhance sexual pleasure, tell him the ways in which they can excite your further and make up for a satisfying act,” asserts Dr. Mehrotra.

8. Assessing all sexual moves : It’s good to tell your partner about your likes and dislikes in bed, but keeping a check on all their moves may just turn out to be way too intrusive. Don’t sound too critical in your words as that may be another way of saying that your needs are not being met.

Quick fix : “Giving him feedback can be a good way out to express that you enjoyed sex with your man, but be cautious of the thin line between feedback and criticism. Try discussing more about what you enjoyed and gradually move on to actions that you didn’t feel too great about. This way, he would get a balanced feedback and thus improvise even more in bed the next time,” advises Dr. Shikha.

Sex is good for you: For fighting cancer to the common cold it's just what the doctor ordered (and men benefit most!)

Making love could be one of the few pleasures in life that is genuinely good for you, say researchers.

Not only does a healthy sex life boost mood, but there is growing evidence to show it boosts your physical well-being, too - from increasing longevity to reducing the risk of erectile dysfunction and even heart attack.

Only last month, researchers at Nottingham University concluded that men who kept up a regular sex life in their 50s were also at lower risk of developing prostate cancer.

(Conversely, they found 'too much' sexual activity - more than 20 times a month - in the 20s and 30s could increase the risk.)

In fact, the research seems to suggest that men - particularly older men - benefit the most from healthy effects of sex. Feel-good hormones help explain some of the benefits, such as mood-boosting, but the explanation is not always obvious.

But one thing is clear, and this applies to both men and women: you need to be having sex regularly if you don't want to lose the ability.

'Use it or lose it' was the advice given to older men by Finnish scientists recently.

They had followed 1,000 men aged between 55 and 75 for five years and found that those who had sex less than once a week at the start of the study were twice as likely to develop erectile dysfunction (see below) as those who had it at least once a week.

Those who had sex three or more times a week lowered their risk fourfold.

As women get older their oestrogen levels drop, says Dr Peter Bowen-Simpkins, consultant gynaecologist at the London Women's Clinic and spokesperson for the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists.

This hormone is key to a woman's sexual enjoyment - lower levels can make sex uncomfortable, he explains.

But American research found that menopausal women who had sex every week had oestrogen levels twice as high as their abstaining counterparts.

'Regular sex increases the production of oestrogen,' says Dr Bowen-Simkins. As long as other symptoms, such as dryness, are not a problem or have been treated, having more sex can decrease the risk of vaginal atrophy which can occur with age, he says.

So what else can a regular love life do for your health?

Heart

Sex can be good for your heart. The idea that men are more at risk of a heart attack during love-making is mostly misconception, say experts.

Professor Peter Weisberg, medical director of the British Heart Foundation, says there is no evidence that men who have sex regularly in their 40s, 50s and beyond are at an increased risk of heart attack.

'As far as the heart is concerned, sex is just another form of exercise,' says Dr Graham Jackson, consultant cardiologist at Guy's & St Thomas' Hospital and president of the Sexual Dysfunction Association.

'In fitness terms, it's equivalent is going for a mile-long walk or climbing up and down two flights of stairs.

'If you're physically fit enough for that, there should be no increased risk during sex.'

A study at Queens University in Belfast found that having sex three times a week could actually halve the risk of heart attack or stroke.

However, if you are over 50, overweight and unfit, there is a risk to your heart - just as there would be if you suddenly and vigorously took up any form of exercise.

Prostate

Prostate cancer is the most common cancer in British men, affecting 35,000 a year.

Previous research suggested that greater sexual activity was linked to a higher risk of prostate cancer, but findings from Nottingham University (published in the British Journal Of Urology International) suggest the opposite is true: that increased activity is protective for older men.

This backs up the findings of a major study five years ago by the National Cancer Institute, published in the Journal of the American Medical Association.

Previous studies have suggested the reduced risk is due to the release of toxins from the prostate gland.

'We can't say for certain that having regular sex can protect older men from prostate cancer, because such studies don't prove the mechanism through which risk is reduced,' says Dr Geoffrey Hackett, consultant urologist at Good Hope Hospital, Sutton Coldfield, and former chairman of the British Society for Sexual Medicine.

'But many men who maintain a regular sex life are also likely to maintain a healthy lifestyle in terms of regular exercise and a better diet. That's likely playing a bigger part in their prostate cancer risk reduction.'

Bones

'Testosterone levels have been found to increase during and after sex,' says GP Dr Sarah Brewer. 'This may provide some protection against male osteoporosis.'

Sexual activity can also protect you against other unwanted changes. Some scientists have linked low levels of sexual activity to structural changes in the penis or testicles which appear to reduce them in size.

'We know that men who don't have regular ejaculations or sexual intercourse have lower levels of testosterone,' says Professor Pierre Bouloux, consultant endocrinologist at University College London and the Royal Free Hospital.

And if your testosterone levels fall and you don't get erections, there is some evidence that the penile tissues can lose some of their elasticity, which in turn could make them appear smaller.

Mood

The evidence suggests that the 'feelgood' effect of making love could be more about chemicals than sexual ability.

'During lovemaking and orgasm, a cocktail of endorphins (the body's natural mood-lifting opiates), neurotransmitters and hormones are released,' says Professor Nadir Farid, consultant endocrinologist and founder of the London Endocrine Clinic.

'Oxytocin, in particular, is a hormone released during and after sex that has been shown to make people more generous towards their partners and can also help induce calm and sleep,' he adds.

Oxytocin is called the 'cuddling' hormone because it's released after just 20 minutes of hugging. Women produce four times as much as men, for whom production is inhibited by the prevalence of the hormone testosterone, which drives libido.

Another key neurotransmitter is serotonin, says Professor Farid. 'Serotonin is the body's key antidepressant chemical and one of the major reasons people smile and feel happy and relaxed after sex.'

Sexually active women in longterm relationships were less likely to be depressed than women who went without sex, according to a study of nearly 300 women by American psychologist Gordon Gallup and published in the Archives Of Sexual Behaviour.

Gallup speculated that semen contains several hormones which may have a mood-boosting effect when they are absorbed through the vaginal wall into the bloodstream.

Immunity

Having more sex might increase immunity from colds and flu.

Having sex once or twice a week has been linked with higher levels of immunoglobulin A, or IgA, a substance found in saliva and the nasal lining thought to help our immune systems fight colds and flu.

In one study, scientists asked 11 volunteers how often they had had sex over the previous month, then measured levels of IgA in their saliva.

Those who had sex once a week or less had a slight increase, compared with those who abstained; but those who made love more often had 30 per cent higher levels.

Professor Ron Eccles, director of the Common Cold Centre and Healthcare Clinical Trials at Cardiff School of Biosciences, is not convinced, though, that sex itself is the key.

It's known that stress and anxiety can also make IgA levels go down, so according to Professor Eccles any connection between sex and colds may be related to other factors.

Longevity

One of the largest studies on longevity and sex - conducted on Welsh men - found that those who had sex less than once a month had double the risk of dying prematurely than those who had sex twice a week.

'Sexual activity seems to have a protective effect on men's health,' says GP Dr Sarah Brewer. 'This may be linked with the effects of the master sex hormone, DHEA or dehydroepiandroterone, which is made in the adrenal glands and functions as a building block of other hormones such as oestrogen, testosterone and progesterone.

'DHEA levels rise just before orgasm and ejaculation to three times higher than normal, and some claim this is how regular sex can prolong your life.'

Fertility

For people trying to conceive, one of the biggest myths associated with fertility is that refraining from ejaculation boosts sperm mobility - the rate at which individual sperm can move forwards to penetrate an egg for fertilisation, says gynaecologist Dr Gillian Lockwood, medical director of Midlands Fertility Services.

'When sperm is hanging around in the epididymis, the long coiled tube in the back of the testes where sperm is stored, it dies off rapidly,' she says.

'Unless a man has a low sperm count, the more often he has sex, then the better the quality of his sperm.'

Preliminary results of a small study two years ago, by Australian researchers, found that in men whose sperm showed significant DNA damage, daily ejaculation reduced this damage by 12 per cent.

'When it comes to sex for fertility, having sex little and often - at least every other night - is far better than lots of it on infrequent occasions.'

And the bad news

Just when you thought you'd had the green light for more passion, the experts strike a cautionary note. Unbridled romping - particularly with a new partner and without protection - comes with bigger risks, especially for the 'Viagra generation'.

Rates of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) in the over 45s have doubled in the ten years since Viagra was launched, and STI rates are now rising faster in older people than they are in the young.

A study last year from University College London found that those in their late 30s and 40s were least likely to use condoms with new partners.

Other research has found that 12 per cent of sexually active over-50s did not use contraception while also not knowing their partner's sexual history.

'This is a generation that didn't have the open sex education that young people get today,' says Professor Janice Rymer, professor of obstetrics and gynaecology at St Thomas' Hospital London.

'Today's 50-somethings probably know less about sexual protection than many of today's teenagers.'

Most STIs are treatable with antibiotics, said Professor Rhymer, but it's important to be aware that some, such as human papilloma virus (HPV), have been strongly linked to cervical, mouth and other cancers.

How to cope when the mechanics let you down

MEN

ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION:

This affects 14 per cent of men in northern Europe and can be caused by underlying medical conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, smoking, high cholesterol, prostate surgery, or a psychological cause such as depression.

Repeated episodes of erectile dysfunction (ED) are a key indicator of undiagnosed early cardiovascular disease, warns Dr Graham Jackson.

'Two-thirds of men with erectile dysfunction have early onset coronary heart disease, in which no other symptoms - such as chest pain - are present.'

Studies have shown that erectile dysfunction could precede the onset of heart problems by three years. This is why men with ED should seek medical advice. 'The greatest risk to your heart comes with buying erectile-enhancing drugs without prescription on the black market,' said urologist Dr Geoffrey Hackett.

Treatments for erectile dysfunction include Viagra and Cialis, which have to be taken up to an hour before sex. These work by increasing blood flow by widening the blood vessels, but are effective in only 50 per cent of men. Cialis Once-A-Day, which is prescription-only, allows men to have sex whenever they want, and so restores the spontaneity lost with other treatments.

PREMATURE EJACULATION: Up to 30 per cent of Western men experience some form of this.

Treatments include condoms with numbing agents, anaesthetic sprays for the penis, antidepressant drugs to lower the anxiety that might cause the condition and pelvic floor exercise therapy.

WOMEN

FEMALE SEXUAL DYSFUNCTION: Up to 43 per cent of women are said to suffer from FSD, including low sex drive and inability to orgasm.

But medical experts question this figure, and the British Medical Journal has accused drug companies of medicalising the natural loss of libido that may come with age or relationship problems.

There are no drug treatments for FSD, though 25 are in development.

MENOPAUSE: The menopause causes a woman's ovaries to slow down and stop producing hormones, including testosterone, for sex drive, and oestrogen, which can reduce lubrication, making sex painful. 'KY Jelly can be effective,' says gynaecologist Dr Peter Bowen-Simpkins.

'Or we can prescribe estradiol, a weak oestrogen applied locally through pessaries or creams to help replace moisture and acidity'.

PAIN OR BLEEDING: 'Pain can be a sign of cysts, fibroids and, in very rare cases, ovarian cancer,' says Dr Gillian Lockwood, consultant gynaecologist. Bleeding is usually caused by benign cervical erosion and is easily treatable. Rarely, bleeding during sex can be a sign of cervical cancer. If it happens more than three times, see your GP.'

Bust the 'Big O' myths

Have you ever faced embarrassment when you haven't been able to climax?

Have you ever been subjected to ridicule because you thought you couldn't climax at all? Individuals have a lot of misconceptions regarding the big O. Even as you are flooded with a lot of misinformation, we will try to bust a few of those myths that disturb you every time you think of hitting the sack.

Myth # 1: An orgasm is always an earth shattering experience and there is something wrong if a woman is unable to experience it
Consultant Purvi Sharma felt depressed every time she had sex with her husband. Newly married, she came away feeling dissatisfied and couldn't speak of her feelings to her husband. "I kept feeling that this wasn't the way my friends described their sex encounters. Why didn't I feel like this is it, this is what I was looking out for. And to top it all I wasn't even feeling so great as I had heard others telling me," she discloses.

Fact: Some women have orgasms and don't know it. Gyanacologist Dr. Seema Pandit explains, "Every individual body has a different way of functioning. Different women reach climax in various ways. Some women do not experience orgasm in the sense of feeling their pelvic floor muscles contract. However, they do experience a peak of arousal after which they feel relaxed or contented, the same feelings others experience after experience after an orgasm." According to Pandit, women who get aroused and do not experience orgasm will sometime feel nervous or edgy or even a certain kind of discomfort in their pelvis.

Beat It: Practice taking deep breaths. The key is to relax and enjoy the process than focusing on whether you have reached climax or not. Too much focus will inevitably lead to a lot of frustration and a sense of stress every time you think you haven't climaxed.

Myth# 2: Men do not have G spots
Graphic designer, Shaurya Kumar was under the same myth like others of his group. "I was always under the belief that men do not have G spots. But only after I explored with my partner I realised that all that is humbug. Actually, the body has a number of G spots and it is only for you to find out what you can do with them," says Kumar.

Fact: Every person has certain G spots in their body. However the problem arises because people are not aware of it. Psychologist Mukesh Tiwari reveals, " Men during intercourse climax easily. But rarely do they realise that there is that G spot which can give them immense pleasure. Couples tend to lose interest in sex after some time, because they get tired of the routine. On the other hand, there are some who take the effort to learn their likes and dislikes. G Spots for men exist on their inner thighs and buttocks. So the more one concentrates on these regions, the more is the stimulation."
Beat It: Tell your partner about the particular kind of stroke that will give you maximum stimulation. Learn about the various ways the penis can be stroked and share this with your partner.

Myth # 3: Inability to reach orgasm means a woman is "frigid" or that there is something seriously wrong with her or her relationship.

Housewife, Vandana Rai confesses that she never felt aroused enough to have a proper climax at the beginning of her marriage. "I wasn't aroused and never felt like having sex. To the point where I began to feel that something was terribly wrong in our relationship. It was only when we sought counseling that most of my fears about sex melt away and I began to feel more normal."

Fact: Pandit suggests that women who were able to have orgasms in the past but can no longer experience it may be suffering from a medical problem or a side effect. "There are women who have never had an orgasm. Again there are those who don't climax because of certain pills, medication they might be taking. In such cases, it is best not to get anxious about the situation. Or wonder whether something is seriously wrong with you or not. Just take the initiative and go and show yourself to a doctor. Professional help will actually ease the situation and give you an insight into what may be actually going wrong."
There are those women too who have never experienced a proper orgasm. For them, Pandit believes, should indulge more into foreplay and oral stimulation and try to reach an orgasm. If that doesn't help, seek counseling which will do away with a lot of inhibitions that clog the mind.

Beat It: Never take undue stress. Communicate your feelings to your partner. Share your anxieties with the one closest to you. Take advise but do not take unwanted suggestions by your peer group. If you are feeling confused, isolated or traumatised then as advised seek professional help.

Myth # 4: "Normal" women achieve climax through intercourse
Richa Rai, a call centre executive recalls, "Most of my friends had told me that climaxing could only take place during sexual intercourse. So obviously I ended up expecting the same with my partner. But I soon realised that it did not work for me. I achieved maximum arousal by oral stimulation. At first I thought I was the odd one out but I decided to be comfortable in my shoes, because there wasn't any harm in the way I was feeling."

Fact: According to psychologist Dr Sudir Kalra, "Only about a third of women experience orgasm regularly during intercourse. A third can reach orgasm with intercourse but need extra stimulation. A third never achieve orgasm during intercourse but can by manual and oral stimulation. Having orgasms by means other than intercourse is a normal variation of female sexuality."
He explains, "In the past, people thought that "mature" women had their orgasms with intercourse; you will sometimes run across an older book that has this view. However, laboratory studies in the 1960's showed that an orgasm is an orgasm no matter which way you obtain it. How a woman reaches an orgasm has nothing to do with her mental health or emotional maturity."

Beat It: If you or your partner are doing something pleasurable, encourage your mate to continue. Enjoy and feel comfortable with your sexuality. Don't put yourself down. It will only make things more difficult for you. Your current inability to have an orgasm is not a reflection of your femininity, your psychological or emotional health.

Myth # 5: If a woman cannot reach orgasm, then her partner is not a skillful lover.
Sheetal Ahuja, a primary school teacher reveals her trauma when she was in doubt of her partner. "I did not climax even after we tried a lot of ways. So I ended up with a huge fight with my partner accusing him of not doing enough. The real reason was that I was angry with myself and quite confused. I didn't know what to do or who to ask about it out of sheer embarrassment. So I accused him of all sorts of things."

Fact: Kalra says, "Getting it right in the act takes a lot of practice and patience. Couples will never get it right at the first go. And it is only through experimenting, being open to learning new techniques in the bed and enjoying the act completely will help you discover each others bodies and pleasure points. While there are many ways a loving partner can help a woman reach orgasm, in the end, a woman is responsible for her own sexual pleasure. That does not mean her partner should not be involved. Communication between partners is very important. It is up to the woman to inform her partner her likes and dislikes in their love making."

Beat it: Try to fantasise. Some women have trouble concentrating during sex. If that is the case, you may wish to fantasise, i.e., thinking about something sexual may excite you and may reduce negative emotions. If you feel that you are very close to achieving an orgasm, alternate tightening and relaxing your pelvic floor muscles. This may sometimes trigger a real orgasm.

Myth # 6: Ejaculation means reaching climax
Aakash Shah, a sales executive explains, "I always thought that I had hit peak when I ejaculated. But my body felt strangely unsatisfied even then. I was exhausted and all that but I wanted to try out other things. After some time I began to ejaculate even without complete arousal. That's when I decided to explore my body and found out amazing things about it."

Fact: Dr Manish Trivedi, urologist Anshuman hospital, explains, "Commonly, it is believed that an orgasm in men happens when they ejaculate. But the truth cannot be far from it. Ejaculation in men is necessary for fertilisation. However men can experience an orgasm without ejaculating. While some men experience orgasmic arousal from all over their body, some get the thrill located at their genital area. The muscles between the perinea region push the seminal fluid along the penile urethra. That's when there is maximum arousal. However, most men sleep off immediately after they have had their first orgasm.

Beat It: If you are those adventurous kinds then try to experiment in bed. Be curious to know about your body. Ask your partner to explore the erogenous areas in your body and speak about your pleasures to her. If there is a certain kind of ambience that helps you get aroused, make the best of it. Never feel shy about discussing your needs.

Myth # 7: Orgasms depend upon penis size
College goer Dev Singh narrates, "My peer group always discussed the size and structure of their penis. And then they would be boasting about it. Friends give a lot of attention to all these things and ended up feeling a loser in the group. In fact I was quite ashamed to discuss it with anyone until my dad found about it and took me to task. S Actually it was him who cleared a lot of myths that I had about size and penis."

Fact : " This is the most prevalent myth. Men have always had inhibitions about their penile size. A bigger size does not guarantee multiple orgasms. The average penis size during erection is between five to six inches and that is enough for pleasure for both the partners. Also pleasure can arise from other parts of the body too. In fact men are of the belief that it their size only that matters," says Trivedi. "Understand that the body comprises of various organs which can give equal pleasure if not more. So do not concentrate all your energy on your penis," he adds.

Beat it: Don't get so hung about numbers. Enjoy yourself in bed with your partner. Stimulate yourself and be in the moment. Don't give in to peer pressure or follow others advises about what to do when you fail to satisfy your partner. Sex is about letting yourself be involved with every kind of feeling.

Myth# 8: Penises without foreskin better for orgasm
"I have heard about it but never verified it with anyone. But anyways, I do not believe in such kind of rumours. I think we have given something by nature and should be completely satisfied by it. No amount of surgery or anything else will help you feel more or less pleasure. Whatever is there, just make the most of it," explains Ravi Rao, a manager with a MNC.

Fact: Tiwari explains that men experience maximum stimulation without or without the foreskin. "The foreskin however does contain a rich variety of receptors and nerve ends than any other part of the penis. That is the reason that men circumscribed feel unjustly deprived of their full sexual potential. Do not go by beliefs and culture. Sex is a very personal experience and the brain is functioned to experience it to the hilt," explains Tiwari.

Beat it: Follow your own rhythm and routine. If you are comfortable in a certain kind of posture, go for it. Do not let your inhibitions or rumours get the better of you. Practice yoga, meditation and a hygienic lifestyle to look and feel better.

How Women Flirts - Is she really interested ?

Men are always complaining that they don’t understand women. This complaint often extends to the world of dating and flirting. Well, there is great news ahead for all of you men…

Women send 5 times more sexual body language signals than men!

That gives all you guys 5 times as many opportunities to learn whether women are interested.

Most men can easily recognize the non-verbal signs when a woman is NOT interested.

Nothing says “get lost” quite like the evil eye you just received from that attractive brunette in the corner!

Watch the reaction when a woman stands guardedly with her arms folded across her chest and a frown on her face. Men will probably be discouraged from approaching her, let alone asking her to dance.

However, men may have a harder identifying the more subtle signals when a woman is interested.

For example, a woman playfully twirls her hair, rubs her arm or leans in a little closer during a conversation.

What do these gestures mean?

They’re all positive signs that she’s interested in you!

She is using subtle, and sometimes subconscious, body signals to let you know how she feels. She doesn’t need to express the words out loud – her actions speak for her.

Women who are interested will focus on looking their best.

Preening tends to be an important part of how women flirt. A woman will focus on her physical appearance as soon as a man catches her eye. She may straighten her skirt, fix her coat or check the buttons on her blouse.

A flirting woman may also toss her hair around, stroke it or comb it slowly.

This is her way of trying to make the best first impression she can. Take it as a sign you can safely approach her.

Eye contact. Here eyes will reveal all.

A woman who is interested will often give a man a few lingering glances – ones that last longer than usual. She will then break the eye contact and look down. This is a submissive sign that most guys love.

She will often narrow her eyes slightly just like those sultry femme fatales in the movies. Her pupils will often dilate when she’s interested just like men.

If she smiles after giving you several glances, it’s a very good sign. It means you might not have to endure yet another lonely Saturday night…

A flirting woman knows the power of touch.

If you watch how women flirt, you will notice that they often use the power of touch. This can connect with a man’s primal instincts almost instantly.

A woman may touch a part of her body. She might cross and uncross her legs while slowly stroking her thigh. Or she might slowly stroke an object such as her glass.

If she touches or rubs her arm, it’s a good sign. If she touches any other part of her body, it’s a great sign!

A woman may also place her hand on your shoulder or leg or playfully pat you on the back. She may “accidentally” touch your hand when she’s passing you something.

If she leaves her hand for more than a few seconds, you should take this as a sign she’s flirting!

She may reveal a bit of skin to show you she’s interested.

A woman who is flirting will often reveal the skin on her shoulders, chest or back by wearing a low cut top or dress. She may lift up her hair to reveal the skin on her neck.

You will often notice a woman undoing a few buttons on her top or drawing up her skirt slightly.

Another area of skin that can be enticing to men is the soft skin of a woman’s wrists.

She may even expose her armpit. This will often drive men wild as long as you remembered to shave!

If she’s smart, she will reveal just enough to get the man’s attention and let his imagination take over.

She will make certain attention getting gestures with her mouth.

Women will often flirt by rolling their hips when they’re walking. Especially when they know you men are watching them as they head off to get a drink or use the washroom.

They may also tilt their head coyly. However, many women perform various attention getting movements with their mouth.

For example, they may lick their lips or apply their lipstick very slowly in front of you. Another common gesture involves eating something very slowly and showing the man how much she enjoys it.

Think of the food scene in 9 ½ Weeks where Mickey Rourke is feeding a blindfolded Kim Basinger fresh strawberries, chocolate syrup, whipped cream and, ice cubes. I’m sure you can picture the rest…

Making pronounced gestures with her lips will encourage a man to visualize kissing her.

She may draw physically closer to a man.

A woman may also lean in closer when she’s talking to you. If she leans close enough to touch you or whisper something in your ear, you know she’s interested.

She may even lower her voice intentionally so you have to move in closer to her!

This is her way of letting you know that she wants you to come physically and emotionally closer. By drawing you closer, she is creating more intimacy between the two of you.

So the next time you are interested in a woman, look for the following clues:

• She fixes her clothing or hair
• She maintains repeated eye contact
• She touches herself or you during conversation
• She reveals skin on her shoulders, chest, neck or back
• She makes attention getting gestures with her mouth
• She moves physically closer to you

These subtle gestures are all important signs that show you how women flirt.

Asanas for good sex

Is there even a link between improving sexual fitness and an exercise like Yoga? Down the centuries, yoga practices have always laid tremendous emphasis on a healthy sexual life.

The spiritual and sexual connection between yoga and intimacy has been debated by Ellen Barrett in her book, Sexy Yoga. "Yoga means union in Sanskrit, and it focuses on bringing one's body into harmony with the mind and spirit. The awareness of sexuality through yoga is deeper and more intimate. These are exercises, which are beneficial for you and your partner, which blend meditation, breath control and asanas. Yoga is about discovering the joys of elegant sexuality," says Barrett.

The healing power of Yoga is so strong that people who are physiologically weak and to some extent or even fully impotent may regain their potency as their physical health is revived through Yoga. Many folks admit that their marital relationship is improving after taking up yoga.

Enrich your love life with Yoga Asanas

1) Lotus Posture (Padmasana):


Padmasana is an excellent posture for all meditative practice and is consider as one of the best posture for concentration. It stimulates the pelvis, spine, abdomen, and bladder and stretches the ankles and knees and also strengthens the semen and spermatozoa. In women it corrects menstrual disorder and improves chances of conception.

Technique Spread a blanket or carpet on the floor and sit down with both your legs spread straight in front of your body while keeping your spine erect. Slowly and carefully, take hold of your right foot and place it on top of your opposite thigh, sole facing upwards and your heel close to your abdomen. When this feels comfortable, bend the other leg and place your foot on top of your opposite thigh. Ideally, both knees should touch the ground in the final position. Your head and spine should be held erect and the shoulders and arms should be relaxed. Also make sure both your thighs and knees are pressed against the floor. Finally, keep your elbows slightly bent and place the wrists of both hands on the respective knees, palms facing upwards. Now close your eyes, relax your entire body and breathe deeply through your nose. Within 10 to 12 days` practice, one can maintain this asana for 10 minutes.

2) Sarvangasana:


Sarvangasana is known as the queen of asanas which works out to be one of the best posture to energise all the sex glands and thereby improves sexual activity in both males and females. By doing this asana correctly, you can be cured of premature ejaculation. It also helps in maintaining erection of penis in males during coitus for a considerable length of time. Sarvangasana posesses medicinal value for curing impotence, frigidity, lack of sexual power and various other defects of sexual organs.

Technique Lie down flat on the floor, on your back, palms by your side, facing down and then slowly lift your legs off the ground, then your thighs and lastly, your hips. Support the whole body- back, hips, thighs and legs - on your elbows, hands pressing against the sides of the back for support. Try to keep it as vertical as possible.
Sarvangasana is a shoulder stand, so your body should be resting on your shoulders and not on your back. Hold this position for as long as possible, while keeping your body steady without shaking or jerking the legs. Remember to exhale while lifting your body up, but once your body is up, you can breathe normally. There is no need to hold your breath. Gradually bring down your whole body and return to the original supine position. This posture must be repeated for at least 3 minutes and after some days increase the time to 5 to 6 minutes.


3) Halsana:

Halsana is one of the best asanas to sublimate sexual energies as its daily practice makes men and women's genetic parts stronger and active. Female problems during menstruation and menopause and some sexual disorders can be remedied by Halsana.

It also invigorates and nourishes all the sexual glands and thereby improves an individual's sexual potential to a considerable extent. It also corrects impotence, frigidity and nightfall.

Technique Lie flat on the carpet with your hands straight by the side of your thighs, palm resting on the ground. Slowly raise your legs together without bending at knees by pressing your hand. Without bending at the knees, raise your hips higher and bring your legs over your head and backwards till your toes touch the ground. Keep your knees straight and legs together in a straight line. You need to remain in this pose for a few seconds, and return to your original position. Aged persons and those suffering from back pain and high blood pressure should not do this asana.


4) Bow Posture, Dhanurasana:

Dhanurasana is a very effective back strengthening exercise and also brings a general improvement in all sexual aspects. It makes the semen thick, gives strength to the penis and vagina and tones the vas-deference tubes.

Dhanurasana keeps sexual organs in a good condition and its regular practice improves chances of conception. Dhanurasana is helpful in increasing the time of astringency (time of sex, when you are finally ready for intercourse after foreplay).

Technique Lie down your abdomen with your forehead touching the ground. With an exhalation, bend your knees and lift your chest using your arms. Reach back with your arms one at a time and grab the outside of your ankles so that your palms are facing inward towards each other.

You need to remain in this position for ten seconds or a maximum of one minute. It is necessary that you exhale completely while you lie flat on the ground. Then inhale slowly and catch hold of your legs and raise yourself to form the bow, hold your breath while you are in this pose. Exhale slowly as you return to the flat-on-the-stomach pose.

5) Back Stretching Posture, Paschimottanasana:


Paschimottanasana is very useful for removing all sexual defects, such as nightfall, premature ejaculation, impotence, semen-atrophy, menstruation, congestion of vagina and sexual weakness.

Regular practice of Paschimottanasana tones up the sex centers in the spine and pelvic organs as well as stimulating the sensory nerves which greatly improves sexual performance of both men and women.

Technique Lie flat on your back on the carpet with hands remaining alongside your body and make sure that your knees are also flat and pressed to the ground. Now, slowly lift yourself to a sitting position and bend forward and clasp the big toe of each foot with your index and middle finger.

Thereafter, bring down your head so that it touches the knees keeping in mind that you do not raise your knees to the ground. Remain in this pose for about 5 seconds and then gradually release your grip on your toes and return to the original position. This needs to be repeated 5 to 6 times a day for a satisfactory result.

6) Peacock Posture, Mayurasana:

Consistent practice of Mayurasana activates the sex glands, strengthens the semen and spermatozoa and corrects menstrual disorders in women. After few months pof ractice one can achieve a total orgasm at the time of intercourse.

It is also helpful in toning up the sex centre in the spine and helps to cure congestion of one's vagina.

Technique Kneel down on the carpet and rest your palms on it facing downwards. Keep your hands firm and bring down your abdomen so that it presses against the elbows. Stretch your legs back and now raise them off the ground balancing at your abdomen on the support formed by the elbows. Remain in this posture for 25 to 28 seconds and return to the original position. This asana is not so easy and learning to balance will take at least three months.

7) Butterfly Posture, Bhadrasana:



Bhadrasana improves sexual performance considerably and its regular practice tones up nerves, muscles and circulatory system of the perineum and the genital organs in both men and women.

Performing Bhadrasana properly, could help in curing premature ejaculation and maintaining erection of penis in males during coitus for a considerable length of time. It also strengthens the circulatory and neuromuscular system of female euro-genital organs and improves chances of conception.

Technique Sit with both your legs fully stretched out and then fold both legs simultaneously ensuring that the soles of your feet touch each other all along. Hold the feet with both hands and draw them nearer to your body trying to touch the genitals with your heels. Press both knees so that they touch the floor.

Keep the upper part of the body and neck erect. Keep both hands on respective knees. With your hands you may swing your legs up and down as many times as you feel comfortable.

Remain in this posture for 5 to 10 minutes and remember this posture can be repeated 4 to 5 times to get good results.


8) Mudrasana:

Mudrasana removes all kinds of intestinal and spleen disorders, corrects menstrual disorders in women and is also helpful in increasing the time of astringency.

It tones up the sex centre in the spine and pelvic organs, as well as stimulating the sensory nerves and is qualitative in anomalies of the urinary secretion and spermatic perversions.

Technique Sit in Padmasana posture with your spine erect and then slowly bend forward until your forehead touches the ground. Exhale as you go down and take your hands behind your back and catch hold of the right wrist by the left hand. Return to the original erect pose inhaling as you go up. Remain in the posture for 10 to 15 seconds

9) Snake Posture, Bhujangasana:


Bhujangasana is one of the best asana for all spinal and back-ache problems and it works as a powerful antidote against wet-dreams and leucorrhoea. This posture is very effective for weakness of semen and it also helps in the development of the chest and firms the bust.

Consistent practice of Bhujangasana strengthens the uterus, testes, urethra, semen and genital organs. This posture is very qualitative in spermaturia, nightfall, semen –atrophy and premature ejaculation (quick fall).

Technique Bhujangasana is a backward bending asana. In the starting position, lie on your belly, while your head rests on your lower arms. Raise your forehead, look upwards and stretch your hands backwards. Let your weight rest on your chest. The head falls a little backwards towards your back and the backward movement proceeds from the neck and the chin.

Move your belly further backward as if someone is pulling your arms. The weight is more and more shifted towards your belly and your lower back does the real work. If you can't raise your chest any further, put your hands and arms next to your chest on the mat without losing the bend.

Stretch your arms so that they stand perpendicular on the floor and at the same time turn your arms a little inward. Relax your lower back and bear your weight with your arms. Move your chest further upwards with every breathing out.

Make your first night memorable

A little anxiety coupled with moments of anticipation and finally some wild thoughts, the perfect first night experience is often sprinkled with moments of coy reservation!

Most couples nurse nervous speculations and deep seated performance anxiety about their first night of closeness. Hearsay from newly wed friends or common beliefs picked up from random sources add to the sexual tension. Knowing the exact way to get it right is an arduous task and if gone wrong, you may end up facing a catastrophic situation in your bedroom with your first nuptial boo-boos.

We spoke to some couples to know the common blunders they made (inadvertently) on their first night. Of course, it wasn't just about 'sex' on the first night, as there were numerous other problems which could ruin the first night craze...

Boo-boo: A moment in haste and its all waste
Without much knowledge about sex, couples encountered awkward situations like premature ejaculation for men or women getting overtly apprehensive about vaginal pain and hymen bleeding. Fear is the biggest factor affecting performance on the first night.

Top Tip: Make the act more pleasurable
No person is a master sex performer, so indulge in a prolonged foreplay session to make your first night a tender bonding experience. Even if things go wrong, stay calm and try again after some time. Sometimes the wedding stress and the discomfort of an all new environment takes a mental toll. The body and mind may not be fully open for the experience of sexual discovery. Being patient is key.

Boo-boo: Experiments can wait
Agreed that it's your first time with your partner, but don't get overtly excited. Couples are all geared up to try new acts in bed, but first try and figure out your partner's comfort quotient.

Top Tip: Every night is a first night
Don't think that the first night is your 'one and only' chance to make love passionately, with time your bond will grow even more special with your better half. The first night is just the beginning of pleasures. Don't fret and waste it in performance anxiety!

Boo-boo: Look sexy in tradition
It's believed that a bride must remain in her wedding outfit and let the husband come and lift up the veil (‘ghoongat’). But modern day brides aren't too interested in donning the ostentatious outfit for too long and the minute they enter the bedroom; they prefer to undress into a sexy lingerie/night gown. Now, no matter how sensuous your night gown maybe, it doesn't have the same charm as a wedding ensemble. This fashion faux pas forms a lesser known, but common goof-up for brides.

Top Tip: Gifts Galore
As the husband lifts up the veil of the bride's wedding outfit, she's entitled to a surprise gift (for 'mooh dikhayee'). Rings, pendants, necklaces are passé; think of something out-of-the-blue, maybe a romantic honeymoon package, which she would be least expecting or a glamorous outfit, a transparent, hot dress, which you'd like her to get clad in just for your eyes.

Boo-Boo: Motor mouth myth
Some might not agree here, but the following is a common occurrence. Your partner is not interested in too much talking, especially on the first night. If you're the new bride, behave like one - blush a little to impart that 'just married' feel. Men should ideally stop narrating a long drawn thesis about their preferences. Being a chatterbox is no less than a slip-up!

Top Tip: Words say a lot more
Don't give each other marathon lessons on your likes and dislikes. Instead writing a romantic letter and keeping it tucked away under the pillow can be a sweet initiating gesture. Open up and talk about your secrets and hidden desires!

Boo-boo: Stop acting as strangers, you're married
We aren't saying shed all inhibitions and get going for a wild act in bed, but at least initiate the process of getting to know each other. Couples often refrain from talking to each other normally on the first night, presuming it's just meant for 'sex!'

Top Tip: Know each other
Start an interesting conversation to break the ice. Share moments you enjoyed on your wedding day and build the comfort level.

Boo-boo: Let the ambiance do the talking
The D-day tiredness is evidently there, but some couples, especially brides, tend to go overboard with the stress factor. This surely is a big turn-off for the other half, as he sees you either sleeping already or all prepared to slip between the sheets without any foreplay act. Just because you're tired!

Top Tip: Ambience unlimited
It's your first night, so your bed may as well resemble a full bloom garden in spring. Decorate it in a way that it sets the mood right for a romantic nighttime ahead. Create a heady ambience with aromatic oils, fragrant flowers, scented bed sheets and sensual music. It will heal your tired souls. Also try a relaxing foot massage to pamper each other. It will set the stage for the real act.

Boo-boo: Forget friends, it's your time to enjoy each other
As per tradition, the bride has to give her young in-laws a bribe to move out of the way before she enters the bedroom. Unfortunately, some in their new 'bahu' avatar tend to allow friends and relatives to come in and sit for hours to gossip, without even realising that the poor hubby is waiting to get spend some alone (private) moments. Grow up girls!

Top Tip: Twosome is the word
Friends and relatives are not going anywhere, stop indulging with them too much, especially on your first night. Concentrate on the man instead and make him feel special and not your in-laws.

The first night is special. Chase your future dreams rather than pining away for distant sexual goals.